Dear First Memory,
Why is it that you arrive so late?
When I look for the beginning of “me,” you’re the first thing I find. And yet, by the time you appear, I’ve already been here for years. Walking. Talking. Learning patterns. Absorbing tone, rules, fears, expectations. It’s as if my life started long before I showed up.
The person I became aware of in that first memory didn’t start there. That self was already formed, already shaped by forces I didn’t choose and couldn’t remember choosing. Language was already loaded. Preferences were already forming. Emotional responses had already been rehearsed.
By the time we get something like self-awareness, the program has been running for years.
And every decision we make after that moment traces back through that early architecture. Our values. Our triggers. Our instincts. Our sense of “reason.” All of it has a history we didn’t write. Even the way we explain our choices is shaped by causes that came before we knew we were choosing anything at all.
So here’s the uncomfortable question determinism whispers:
If every decision is processed through a system built without our consent, how free can that decision really be?
We don’t choose the code. We execute it. Even if the parameters are wide, even if the system is complex, it is still a system responding to inputs according to its structure.
When a computer produces output that doesn’t align with expectations, we call it a glitch. When a human does the same thing, we call it “free will.” Different words. Same phenomenon.
So we turn to you, dear reader, and ask:
When was the last time you made a choice that was truly out of character?
Which explanation feels more honest: free will… or glitch?
Bound and determined,
~ The Radical Left